[trusting the spirit to help me adjust]

Hermana Kristi Koerner is a dear sister from my mission who we all looked to for advice and council. She is so full of Christlike love and patience. I learned a lot from her story and I hope you can too!

"Post-mission adjustment is different for everyone and when I would
talk with a friend who said it was no big deal, I pretty much had to
walk away. It was hard. And the things I thought would be hard (the
things I'd mentally prepared for) weren't, and then all these other
issues or facets were.

I remember coming home. The excitement and nervousness all rolled into
one and yes, a peace and happiness with the knowledge that I had
served my mission whole-heartedly, obediently, without holding
anything back. That feels good : ) On the plane home I was able to
share the gospel with a little family and I helped them with their
luggage. Finally I greeted my family and it was hugs and cheering for
5 minutes. Then my parents started fighting. And my siblings started
arguing about something trivial. And I felt completely lost. Rather
than being overly excited to hear my stories, my family was loaded
with complaints and arguments as we drove from the airport to the
stake center where I was released. This wonderful Spirit that I
carried with me was clinging on for dear life amidst the turmoil of my
family. My family was not in a healthy place spiritually despite all
my efforts during the mission to strengthen them and I felt an
increasing responsibility to be their rock when I came home. I
instigated prayers, scripture study, and FHE. I dragged my sisters to
institute and helped one sister, who though prompted to serve her
mission had procrastinated, prepare for her mission.

It was a train wreck. I struggled to reach out to former mission
companions even because it was hard to hear how wonderful everything
was for them (obviously not understanding they went through a similar
adjustment). As I found that fewer and fewer people really wanted to
hear about my mission stories, I stopped wanting to talk to people. My
friends still in the mission were wonderfully supportive but I felt I
had to be encouraging them to focus on their missionary work instead
of dumping my problems of them.

Heavenly Father blessed me with a multitude of tender mercies during
this time. It was certainly a time that I was aware that I had to put
into practice many of the lessons I learned on the mission. Maybe that
was the purpose of it all along. I had learned to better recognize the
direction of the Spirit and I held tightly to the inspiration and
revelation I received as I sought guidance for what I needed to do
despite all the clamoring voices surrounding me. I followed the
promptings to move across the country, by myself, to Arizona and I
started fresh.  I had to give myself permission to do what was best
for me at that time and to realize that I wasn't personally in charge
of my family's choices. Things have improved and I'm happy to report
that I am happy, balanced, involved in my stake and ward, and
genuinely in a wonderful place now. It's a process of learning how to
become who Heavenly Father needs me to be in each stage of my life.
And dating, well... that's a whole other saga : )"

[hold tight, ride on]

This is the first post from an awesome outside contributor named Rachel Roy. She recently returned from the Massachusetts Boston Mission. Rachel has always been an amazing example of perseverance and trust in the Lord amiss various health complications and, well, life!  

"My mission President, President Packard in the Massachusetts Boston Mission shared with us, "A mission is the training wheels for an unselfish, consecrated life." This always stuck with me from the moment I heard it. The mission is only the training wheels, but once the mission comes to a close, the training wheels come off as we can ride the journey that is set before us. We were given the tools and experiences to know how to give all that we have to the Lord. I wouldn't necessarily say that coming home from a mission has made me question my purpose by not feeling like I have one. Instead, I feel my focus has been adjusted as I now realize how the Lord has given me everything--literally everything--every breath, every capacity, every blessing--and so it's up to me to give everything I can back to Him. It comes with discomfort many times as we constantly seek His will for us. A lot of times it's up to us to figure out what resources he's given us and how we can utilize them to bless and strengthen those around us.

Coming home has most certainly been far from easy for me. In a comical yet serious sense, the quote that best seems to fit: "Coming home from a  mission is like riding a bike…except your bike is on fire, and you're on fire, and you're riding through hell." Change has definitely played its role, some I never imagined would have taken place as soon as I stepped off of the air plane. Yet, through all this, I know change is a part of life. We just have to hold onto the faith that we obtained. We have to stay true to our covenants and all that we have treasured on the mission as it can continue to be our  treasure. I know God has a plan for each of us. Sometimes it really is just a matter of holding on, yet we can hold onto the gospel of Jesus Christ. We can rely on the Atonement as it carries the ability to continually change, learn, and grow. I know that as long as we depend on Him, He provides every wit of faith, hope, comfort, and true joy that we can obtain as we will eventually obtain all that He has as He has given His all to us."

{A little bit of an intro}

So coming home from a mission was a bit different than anticipated, as I believe we can all agree. As a dear friend explained it “it felt like my superpowers had been taken away”. I felt like I wasn't important anymore. Like I no longer had a significant roll in the work of the Lord because I wasn't sporting my amazing black badge. Each day began to feel a bit like on autopilot. I can’t say it wasn't amazing to be with my family again, but other than that I was bombarded with a whole load of responsibilities that just seemed so trivial compared to the work I had previously been emerged in.

After being home 6 months.. and them having been a rough bit of 6 months.. it finally hit me that I've been looking at this whole RM thing wrong. I would find myself writing my friends still in the field saying something to the extent of “enjoy your mission because life at home is way overrated”.

I loved my mission.

I wanted to go back.

But I had a rough awakening on how sad my perception of this new amazing chapter the Lord has prepared for me. It finally clicked in my head that the Lord didn’t send me on a mission just for mission’s sake. The Lord sent me on a mission to prepare me for what’s ahead. It’s like a doctor. They don’t just spend years and years of training for nothing. They do it so they can put it in PRACTICE and use it to benefit others. Missionary service doesn’t end when you are “released” from the official calling. Think of your releasing more of a type of graduation. CLEARLY we aren’t perfect. It’s more like we’ve made it out of gospel pre-k and now we’re finally ready to go to elementary. But either way, it’s progression. A new chapter. We must remember what we learned. Cherish what we learned. But be ready to move on. Build on it. Just how in school you can’t do astrophysics without first learning addition and subtraction. You can’t read a novel without first knowing the sounds of vowels. We’ve been sent to build that firm foundation to learn those basics and now we are called to build on top of that. CONTINUE PROGRESSING. Yes. Rumor has it that progression is still possible post-mission. That’s why I decided to start up this blog. I’m no know-all, post-mission guru, so I’ve sent out a survey to receive feedback from 100’s of different returned missionaries and am open to any suggestions or guest posts, just email them to betruetothenewyou@gmail.com, so as a family we can advance together. Learn from each other. So now go. And DO. And be true to the new you while you’re at it.